Between moves, life changes and transitioning into Junior High, we've been dealing with a whirlwind of emotions lately. Yes, change is a part of life. I think we all intellectually get that, but emotions, they can be a tricky fish.
I know that over the years, Luka has dealt with alot of changes, and with his Asperger's, it's not always been that easy.
...so, how's the best way to cope with feelings...especially when your emotions are all over the place?
Here's a process that I have been using lately. Hopefully it can help your kiddos.
First. Start By Noticing
The first step is always to recognize how you feel about anything, the second is to accept it. I always say, it's o.k. to feel how you feel...and you shouldn't feel bad, guilty or weird about it. Just acknowledge them so you can see what they're saying.
Call Them By Their Real Name So many kiddos (and adults do this too) clump their emotions...and by this I mean, using a general word like angry to describe how they feel.But emotions come in a variety of ways, and they each have a name. Sticking on the surface really doesn't help anything.
So instead of just settling on mad, dig a little deeper and ask yourself "Are you mad or are you also sad, embarrassed, and/or scared?" Call your feelings out! Don't let them hide behind each other. Naming exactly how you feel, helps you to find the right ways to heal.
Move The Scale The last step is to picture the range of emotions as if they were on a scale with one side being ECSTATIC and the far other end being totally P*ED OFF.
Where are you on that scale? All the way on one side? Somewhere in the middle?
The point is that, once you have identified where you are at you can work towards getting to where you want to be. Essentially moving the scale.
For example, if your child is feeling anxious about school beginning again...you can talked to them and help them feel less anxious and possibly help them to feel at peace.
We use the mindfulness app Stop, Breathe &Think Kids to help with this. The picture above is the scale they give and it allows kids to select all of the ways they are feeling. This has been excellent in getting Luka to self identify, and now it's so incredibly easy for him.
Once you identify how you're feeling in the app, it provides guided meditations specifically designed to help with moving the scale little by little...and afterwards can be a great conversation piece.
I've been looking for something like this for years and I am so happy to finally have found it.